I have something I want to share. But my brain is stuck. I take that back. My brain is working just fine. But somewhere between the whirling gears in my head and the calloused pads of my fingers (thank you violin), I have a disconnect. Does that ever happen to you? *sigh*
But I'm trying to be a more consistent blogger. It's a discipline I truly wish to nurture and pursue. So...until I get to share the thought that has been mulling around my spirit for nearly a month, I will share something else with you. Because it has to do with my state of mind right now.
A little while I came across this quote: "The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without the work." - Emily Zola
It was one of those quotes I immediately flagged and saved and wrote down to memorize. Because it's both encouraging and convicting. Also, because it jolted my mind back to a poem I started writing about a year ago (still unfinished).
It began with the thought: After a beautiful song has been played, it would be foolish for the piano to think it had done the work. Somewhere in the middle is this phrase: I may not always understand / But I concede the right to play. And it might end with these lines: And when the last note has been aired / Let the song point straight to you / For art is not in the instrument / But in the one who plays the tune.
The past year or so has shown me that blogging is a gift of mine. It's a gift that has given back to me as well. When I share something that has been on my mind, and the thought comes out just right, and I find out one way or another that I've encouraged someone...I don't feel as if I can take any credit. While it's my crazy thought, in some ways I'm just an instrument. Blogging is like playing violin for me. I just play (or write), and somehow...it works. It's a gift.
But like Emily Zola says here, the gift is nothing without the work. I can hit those moments, and blog those thoughts because I work at it. I need to continue to push myself: To fight through the mental apathy and write even when my 'muscles' are tired. To keep up with my inspirations before they get stale and I have to try to recapture the truth I stumbled upon. To be unafraid of sounding silly, because it's when you let go that truly magical moments happen. To put in the practice time so that I'm ready for the moments when I'm standing next to a microphone....
So this is me. Working at it. Not to force it. I don't ever want to do that. But to develop. To grow.
What's your gift? Are you willing to put in the work?